A Day in The Life of Our Medical Journey
This is how I am starting my day again. Sitting in a doctor’s office parking lot.
Today is a bit harder though. Today I could just sit here and weep as my daughter walks off by herself to go get 25-30 nerve blocks in her head for another month.
I’m choosing to not give in to my emotions though in just the off chance the “Corona Police” are not at the front door inspecting everyone (please, do not criticize my response). I know they are there to help and protect others, but when you live what we live, it isn’t easy to run into this “all” the time.
Thanks to this Corona Pandemic she has to do all her doctor appointments alone, because they will not let me anywhere near the building.
Seriously people, who wants to get all of these shots in their head and do it alone?
I can speak for myself, no, not me! I hate shots and I’m talking just the ones you get in your arm.
But for my precious daughter, she is getting them in her head to help with her chronic migraines. It is the only way she can manage them now. She does this once a month, but who knew we would ever get to a point in life where she would be forced, by others, to have to endure this all alone.
Today is one of those difficult days to watch her suffer and struggle.
I have already texted my husband asking, why?!? Why does she have to battle to live a “normal” life.
Why does everyday have to be one where she endures pain and overwhelming fatigue?
Why can’t she be healthy and live a “typical” college kid’s life?
This has been an exasperating week for us, which is probably why I just want to sit and weep and maybe even just cry.
Our health insurance, which is suppose to be the top of the line, has decided that because she reached her “projected” graduation date that they are going to cancel her health insurance in a matter of days.
These are the same people who pay a “ton” of money for her health care already.
So we have had to jump through some mega hoops to get the proof from her college, (that is closed down due to the Covid-19 crisis), to prove she is still in college.
I am completely baffled as to how and why this is happening still.
We are left now praying that everything we submitted will work to prove she is still in college. If just one person slows this process down, she will be left not covered by health insurance.
Without health insurance all her treatments will stop, she will not have access to the specialists we spent years trying to find, and we will not be able to afford all the medicine she is on.
This is such as scary thought as I write it. It should be something we shouldn’t even have to be going through. The system is seriously broken for this to be occurring. This was something we knew would be coming on her 23rd birthday, and that we were prepared mentally for, and would not have waited until the last minute, or in this case, second, to fix it.
No, in this situation, someone made a serious mistake 2 years ago and we are just now finding out about it and have literally hours to fix it before the damage it will cause to my daughter will be massive, debilitating and permanent.
So, I sit here with a knot in the pit of my stomach, looking at a busy parking lot. There is an ambulance and a fire truck at the entrance where I keep looking up to see if my daughter is walking out of.
I’m left to sit here asking God why? Why does she have to suffer? What will be her story? What will be her testimony? Why does every day have to be a battle?
Until God decides the time to reveal those answers, I know I just have to keep trusting in Him for the direction, protection, and discernment.
Are you in a similar battle? I know others are. Please know I’m here with you. I know the lonely feeling this life brings. Please know if you are, I standing beside you.
You’re not alone!